I've always been idle. I can say that now. If drink is the curse of the working classes than sloth is the vice of the lazy bastard.
If I can't automate something then I won't do it. Every bookie I use, I sign into with RoboForm, I float around my apartment on pillows made of air, my days are spent figuring out ways to do things with less effort and my nights dreaming of a world without toil.
"You've probably heard it said that there are no shortcuts to value. Well that's a crock of shit."
You've probably heard it said that there are no shortcuts to value. Well that's a crock of shit. There's plenty of shortcuts and one of them is to copy what somebody else is doing.
Personal development gurus tell us Model Yourself On Other Achievers. What I believe they mean by this is "leech off the squares for kicks and be smoking their cigars, drinking their brandy and sleeping with their women while they're knee-deep in bats, cats and statistical models".
"Personally, I'd kick my bald-headed grandma down a flight of stairs for the chance of sitting back and earning a ton of cash while a bunch of saps do all the hard work."
That's a maxim I've certainly tried to live by. A man may work for many things: his family, his vocation, his self-respect. But personally, I'd kick my bald-headed grandma down a flight of stairs for the chance of sitting back and earning a ton of cash while a bunch of saps do all the hard work. You get me?
That's why I came up with my TBGS (Talent Borrows, Genius Steals) system - a method of selecting and following successful free tipsters. I've tried similar things before but for one reason and another they all fell by the wayside. A combination of poor selection, bad staking and lack of experience led to losses and recriminations - this doing nothing lark was looking like hard work and it was costing me too.
And yet I persisted. The lure of a steady income through this type of investment proved too strong.
When I was rounding up my posse of tipsters this time around I wanted to get the right blend. A mixture of young guns eager to prove themselves and old heads who wouldn't panic when the going got tough. After many weeks of Pop Idol style auditions and hasty recruitment the time came - we were ready to roll.
It started off better than I could have hoped. My boys set off at a blistering pace and after 250 bets I was at 21% yield. Man, this was easy - this was the good life and champagne baths with supermodels would surely follow.
Then, the losing runs came. Big, long Agatha Christie's The Mousetrap runs that seemed to defy logic. Previously rock-solid tipsters seemed to lose their ability to think straight, coming out with bizarre analysis like "surely Roma must win some time so I'm backing them today".
However often I told myself it was merely the ups and downs of gambling playing out I couldn't help wondering if I'd made a terrible mistake.
"However often I told myself it was merely the ups and downs of gambling playing out I couldn't help wondering if I'd made a terrible mistake."
So I tightened up my focus - audited all the tipsters and tried to put my finger on what was going wrong. Some tipsters were included on the basis of a short but spectacular winning run - they were shown the door.
I then jettisoned tipsters who were taking part in competitions. With the lure of cash prizes tipsters often go for broke and take unnecessary risks, forgetting about value with their eyes on the duckets.
The system's performance stabilised in the following months and became my main source of betting income.
What I liked most about TBGS was the impressive "churn". The high number of bets means you are constantly reinvesting your money so that even a relatively small yield can get you a decent steady income.
"The staking plan. Rather like abortion, the death penalty and kissing a boy on the first date these are matters I like to leave to an individual's conscience."
Most importantly, the risk on any individual bet is reduced and spread over several events meaning upsets are less damaging and you can stake less per bet, but the same per week (or month etc).
We come to the thorny issue of the staking plan. Rather like abortion, the death penalty and kissing a boy on the first date these are matters I like to leave to an individual's conscience. Much will depend upon how risk-averse you are.
I tend to heed the counsel of Doctor of Danger who is an advocate of fixed profits although there are rumours that he will be adding a sprig of plateau staking to spice things up - more on this in later newsletters.
Start progressive staking, of course, and you'll find your profits tumbling quicker than Arjen Robben.
At first I was using an eccentric staking plan which affected my profits. The state of affairs at the time of writing is at 1.17% yield over 1680 bets - respectable enough over a long period.
However, TBGS using a fixed profits plan takes a bank of £10,000 to £23,722 profit in five months. That's with fixed profits staking to 4% of the original bank on each bet (£400) giving 2.67% yield.
"TBGS more than trebles your bank in five months. This is attainable with tipsters freely available in the public domain."
So, TBGS more than trebles your bank in five months. This is attainable with tipsters freely available in the public domain and reputable bookmakers who don't have exorbitant withdrawal fees.
How might you go about developing a system along the lines of TBGS? Well, you'll need to assemble a stable of tipsters to begin with. Tipster sites like: Betting Advice, Bet Shoot and FC Bet are good places to start.
You may find tipsters with their own sites on your journeys. If they have mail notification then take advantage of it - if the tipster is any good you'll find the prices he quotes won't last long.
For those who don't have mail notification make sure you get your paws on a website monitoring programme like Website Watcher which notifies you every time one of your sites is updated. Getting that extra 10 minutes head-start can be the difference between getting on at a value price or watching your edge disappear before your eyes.
Following free tipsters is just one of many ways you can attempt to get money off the bookies. I'm personally finding it a particularly satisfying, low-maintenance way.
You may prefer to do the hard work yourself, believing that success is a journey not a destination.
I hear you brother, but I'm shouldering with Ronald Reagan when he said "They say hard work never hurt anybody, but I figure: why take the chance?"
BBC
